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♥ ğïЯℓ ïи†ΣяμþτΣ₫ ♥

if i
could find
you now,
things would get better
[ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ]
[ calendar | livejournal calendar ]

i think of you and everything's all right... [01 Sep 2004|03:46pm]
[ mood | blank ]

im kinda sad right now. i think ujournal(.org) is gone... forever...


its dumb, yes. but that was my very first journal site. some good stuff happened in there. my first journal EVER, and i can never go back + look through the good times that was 7th-(part of) 8th grade. :(

(1) saw me fall & didn't save me

i'll be your frenchmaid, when i'll meet you at the door. [01 Sep 2004|11:16am]
[ mood | cheerful ]

im in love the chorus of this song. its like... hotlikewhoa! + gets me all hot+bothered

You make me wanna la la
in the kitchen on the floor
I'll be your french maid
When I'll meet you at the door
I'm like an alley cat
Drink the milk up I want more

You make me wanna
You make me wanna scream

hotlikewhoatimes5!Collapse )

and you cant deny it.


(5) saw me fall & didn't save me

gah! [01 Sep 2004|10:18am]
[ mood | pensive ]

dude, i just downloaded a bund of i mean... i just bought a bunch of... LTLC songs...?

::shifty eyes::

uh... and i just realized how much ass they kicked, and i miss them... :-(

OMG! and little stevan diaz emailed me lastnight!!!! remember ana? You rock MY jungle!

lol. eeeee! i was so happy. stevan was so funny. he should come back to preusshell. :-(

(1) saw me fall & didn't save me

last post for tonight i swear. [01 Sep 2004|01:04am]
[ mood | cheerful ]

look guys! i dont look like crap in this one!!!Collapse )

(2) saw me fall & didn't save me

i used to think i had it good [01 Sep 2004|12:57am]
[ mood | bored ]

i think i reply to comments alittle too much for my own good.

(1) saw me fall & didn't save me

i dont usually do this, but im curious... even though im guessing i'll get zero actual comments... : [31 Aug 2004|10:53pm]
Leave a comment with your name if you want to know what I really think of you, and I’ll reply and tell you. No lies, all honesty.

Post it in your journal after I do yours so I can see the reverse.
(7) saw me fall & didn't save me

things are never gonna be the way you want [31 Aug 2004|10:19pm]
[ mood | guilty ]

rauly poopy facewas here last night. and he played with my label maker.

he forgot to bring me a hammager though. and i was really hungry. and i had really bad cramps. + i was mad cause i didnt do anything.

i wanted to go to the store, but my mom didnt take me. gr.

so. the quince.

um. i got there was angry. at the table i was sitting at there was some guy on the opposite side, and he kept staring at me. and it just got me more mad. then my mom saw my grandma at another table so she wanted to move tables, and i was jsut like "tell her to come over here!" but we ended up moving instead cause my cousin came over and asked me why i was mad. then he told me he got his nipples pierced. my reaction "WHAT!?" i dont know why i was so shocked. its so luis like to do that. then he showed them to me, i was gonna take a picture, but i didnt get a chance to. i was angsty some more. and my aunt called my friend martin over, and he sat by me, and i was still feeling emo-angst like whoa. then i started drawing on napkins. then... i started taking some random pictures. i painted on the napkins with some of my nail polish. then this little girl walked by me, and i gave her a picture of a butterfly. and then she decided to make herself my friend, and she went to get a piece of paper, sat next to me, and drew me a picture. i later found out that the girl was martin's cousin. :-\. then martin + i went outside, and we just hung out, talked, ect. then some little annoying kid came over to us. and he was really annoying. and he wouldnt go away. then the security came oer to us, and asked if he was with us, and we were like "NO!!!!" so the guy made him leave. haha. sucker. and thats about it. i got cold, so we went back inside, had cake. then end. nothing special. and i feel uber bad for not going to carolina's quince.

and today i went to the fabric store, and my mom was looking at "party favors" for quinces.

which leads me to the big australia vs. a quince dilema.

the deal was, i either go to australia, or i have a quince.

and i was like "australialikewhoa!", and it wasnt a problem at the time, but come my 15th birthday, and my mom... i dont know... i just... i definitely dont REGRET going to australia... but i feel like i made a really selfish decision. i DID make a selfish decision. i thought only of what i wanted. and i know my mom is hurt beyond being healed.

whenever we're at a quince. its like. i see the hurt in her eyes. i feel like i've deprived her of something that she was automatically entitled to in being mexican, and having a daughter. and i hate myself for not having thought of that before. as much as im glad i went to australia, i feel like i should have made a decision not only based on what i wanted, cause in the end, im not the only who was affected. gah. and today she said something about a quince. i dont remember exactly what she said. but when she said it it stung. i felt like bursting into tears and apologizing non-stop to let her know that it hurts me to know that i have caused her that pain. a pain that as much as she may try to hide or deny... i know is there. and... bla. i dont know. i wish i could fix things. but nothing i do will bring back my 15th birthday. so. i guess i just gotta live with what i got, and accept that things are never gonna be the way you want. right?



(1) saw me fall & didn't save me

im not selene [30 Aug 2004|08:56pm]
dude, i need to change my password.

FYI: those last 2 entries were written by raul.
(6) saw me fall & didn't save me

did i part 2 [30 Aug 2004|08:53pm]
By the way, i didn't
(1) saw me fall & didn't save me

did i or did i not, that is the question [30 Aug 2004|08:50pm]
i just sucked raul's penis and it tasted kinda weird but i swallowed

wait, did i really do that?
wait to find out more on next weeks episode; DID I?
(1) saw me fall & didn't save me

your voice rings like a bell... [30 Aug 2004|10:25am]
[ mood | tired ]

my brother came back from AZ on saturday night, and he starts school today.

agh, just another reminder of the fact that i start school next week.

(3) saw me fall & didn't save me

yesterday was the worse day ever... and tomorrow wont be better... [29 Aug 2004|11:53am]
[ mood | calm ]

i didnt get to see jack johnson, social d, the foo fighters, afi, dilated peoples, A Tribe Called Quest, Ben Harper & the Innocent Criminals, The Killers, jimmy Eat World, P.O.D., Roots Rock Reggae Festival, OR Slightly Stoopid.


cause i was at some boring quince for some girl i didnt even know.

AND, i didnt get to go carolina's quince, and i feel so bad about myself, i just want to... through [a glass] something at the wall. a thousand times.


i when i got to the reception i was so angry. and the stupid candy michine didnt return all of my Goddamn change. i think it was cause the reception place was owned by a church, and since i dont go to church, the stupid michine took my money. on purpose.

i was angry when i got there. i REALLY did NOT want to be there. at. all. i wasnted to scream, i wanted to cry, i wanted to knochdown tables, kick some ass, and just... LEAVE. i think i might still be a bit angry. :-\

reason #1487 for why family sucks almost as much cock as selene.

speaking of selene.

wow, selene, i must say you've really outdone yourself this time. really, you have.

but i must also say, i find it a bit confusing the way you go around school telling people "oh denise? yeah i dont really care about her anymore, i dont hate her anymore, i just dont care"


"cuz i dont give a rats ass about you! get it? got it? good!!!"
"i just wanted to be friends denise! i heard really good things about you and i thought we can work this out! i was willing to do it! i thought u were too! dou have too much pride denise! i had pride and that got me no where! y dont u want to fix things denise? y?"
"denise if you still ahte [hate] me too abd [bad] cuz i dont hate you, really i could care less but if you wanna bve [be] friends im gald to do so"

you know, a really good way to fix things, is to TRY to use what one writes in their journal against them. TWICE! you know, the way you have done.

i just want to say that you almost got me. i was amazingly close to saying, this is getting rediculous, im going to make a new journal. but you know what? i decided not to. because by doing that, im basically giving you the upper hand. if i were to go and make a new journal, i'd be showing that i feel i need to run from you, that i need to hide from you, in order to feel secure about that i feel & think and write in my journal. but i didnt make a new journal b/c selene, you dont scare me, and you most certainly dont intimidate me. therefore, i have no need to run from you, i have no need to hide from you. so read on bitch! cause everyone likes a whore who can read.

selene, raul and i have been through thick and thin, through good, bad, very good, and very bad. and here we are, still friends. and i plan to keep it that way. you can bet that im going to put up a fight and try to defend myself when one of my greatest friendships with someone is on the line. especially if its because of something that came out of you disgusting mouth. im not going to let a great friendship just die because you hate so much hate inside you that you feel the need to ruin something great that you dont have.

so all i can say is, i wish you luck in washington (cause your not the only one who's been doing some journal reading, bitch) and hopefull by this coming summer you won't find yourself trying to run away from there, cause like they say, history has a tendency to repeat itself. and since i know saying "stay away from sex" would have no effect on you, cause your whore, and whores are like that, all i can say is get your nasty ass on the pill, and use protection, cause i'd hate to see you with a kid, or even HIV/AIDs your parents will probly be disappointed of you don't. and dont forget to stay away from those seven deadly sins, especially "lust". cause wanna-be christians like you should:


i had so much more to say to you, but right now, not all of it is coming to me, and i think that a whole half of my entry should be more than enough of a tribute to you, so enjoy, bitch.

(1) saw me fall & didn't save me

[26 Aug 2004|11:49am]
i dont get the "ocean avenue" video... if the line goes "i remmeber the look in your eyes, when i told you that this was good-bye, you were begging not tonight, no here, not now..." then why is she trying to get away from him???
(2) saw me fall & didn't save me

[26 Aug 2004|11:36am]
has anyone listened to the "scissor sisters"????
(2) saw me fall & didn't save me

[26 Aug 2004|11:33am]
i. make. the. best. tuna. EVER!!!!!

why you ask??

because im God because im a genious.
(2) saw me fall & didn't save me

[25 Aug 2004|10:44pm]

reno911! is THE BEST effin' show EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(4) saw me fall & didn't save me

sign it, bitches! [25 Aug 2004|03:59pm]
(2) saw me fall & didn't save me

[25 Aug 2004|02:20pm]

i made an image map for my info. look at it NOW!
(1) saw me fall & didn't save me

When I, I hear you scream i hear your cry It makes me realize I'm only human [25 Aug 2004|10:04am]
[ mood | bouncy ]

i also decided that i want to have a 16th birthday party.... at hooters.

i only wanna invite friends though.

yep. all three of 'em. :-( but i get the feeling bryan wouldnt be able to go. :-\

and lj friends will be invited as well...

eee! im already excited.

(10) saw me fall & didn't save me

Funny thing is when I look into your eyes I sense something so sincere in your disguise [25 Aug 2004|09:05am]
[ mood | bored ]

my past few days have been bla.

nothing's happened.

im mad at raul (surprise surprise).

my brother is in arizona again, and isnt coming back 'till saturday.

i woke up late today, so i didnt get to go to work.

the dermatologist place didnt call me back, so im gonna call again.

i came up with an idea for how to decorate my messenger bag.

i got a new email address. (but im still using my other one)

i accidentally touched my back door while it still had wet paint, so now it has a finger mark.


(1) saw me fall & didn't save me

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